Posts

Showing posts from June, 2011

How To Burn Yourself While Doing the Dishes (A Tutorial)

1. Fill sink with hot, soapy water to wash the handful of dishes from supper.
2. Wash half of the dishes.
3. Grab pot on the stove not realizing that the burner is still on. This will burn your hand from the tip of your pointer finger to the tip of your thumb.
4. Drop pot.
5. Get out potholder, carry pot to sink.
6. Forget that the spoon inside the pot is probably hot as well; grab spoon with the same hand you grabbed the pot with. (So I'm not the brightest crayon in the box....)
7. Drop spoon.
8. Open freezer and grab closest chunk of ice you can get your hand on.
9. While holding ice, google "what to do for a burn."
10. Find website that says, "Do not put ice directly on burn as this can damage the skin even more."
11. Drop ice.
12. Shove your hand into the closest cold water you can...which happens to be your glass of ice water. (You must take the ice out first, though. See #10)
13. While holding your hand in your glass, go raid your roommates bathroom looking for anyt…